The X-Men #3

Featuring: X-Men
Release: November 5, 1963
Cover: January 1964
12 cents
Written by: Stan Lee
Illustrated by: Jack Kirby
Inked by: Paul Reinman
24 pages

Before we start dissecting the bizarreness of this comic, I’d like to draw attention to the cool title font. Hat tip I presume goes to Art Simek.

I have a bit of difficulty assessing this issue. I can see two different stories: the one on the page, and the one Stan meant to write. In the story Stan meant to write, he failed miserably. I am confident he meant to portray Professor X and the X-Men as virtuous heroes. But any reasonable reading of the issue shows them to be the villains. That latter interpretation is interesting to me, but clearly not intentional.

This issue makes clear that Professor X and the X-Men have questionable ethics, though I don’t think Stan intended it that way. He just didn’t think it through. But later writers will look to stories like this as evidence that Professor X has a dark side.

Let’s talk about Jean. She’s the only girl on the team. In the first issue, everybody but Bobby was fawning over her. Bobby noted he wasn’t interested in girls. Even Professor X made questionably appropriate comments given that he was referring to a student.

The X-Men are going to partner up, so everybody wants to partner up with Jean. This time that includes Iceman. Cylops seems less eager, but we peer into his thoughts. He is tormented by how dangerous his power is. We’d seen in the first two issues that he always wore his visor or glasses. They are now explicit that he must wear them, as they are the only thing that allows him to control his powers. Because his powers are so dangerous, he is grim and somber. He also has strong feelings for Jean, but dares not tell her out of fear for how dangerous his powers are. Stan seems to like his tragic heroes, denied their true love by the very circumstances that make them superheroes.

But then it gets weird. Look to what Professor X is thinking. “As though I could help worrying about the one I love! But I can never tell her! I have no right! Not while I’m the leader of the X-Men and confined to this wheelchair!”

There’s a lot to unpack there. His feelings for Jean are indeed inappropriate. It’s not because he leads the X-Men, and certainly not because he’s in a wheelchair. People in wheelchairs are in fact allowed to be in love, Stan. There are two big problems here. The first is the question of age. I often think of Professor X as being pretty old. Patrick Stewart played him at age 60. Jean is clearly a teenager in this comic, probably 17 or so. Now, the evidence of the comic suggests that Professor X is actually younger than I usually consider him. I would guess from contextual clues that he is in his late 20s. No matter his precise age, the fact of being a college graduate makes him too old for a teenager.

The second problem is the student/teacher relationship. Teachers can’t go around falling in love with their students, especially not their high school students. The fact that it’s a private school with only one female just makes it weirder. That is not okay, Professor X. You should not be teaching high schoolers.

His problematic thoughts about Jean are only the beginning of everything wrong with Professor X and the X-Men. We go next to the treatment of the Blob.

Again, I’m pretty certain Stan sees Blob as the villain of the issue and the X-Men as the heroes.

Let’s see how it begins. Sure, Blob is a bit rude, particularly toward the lady. But they have invaded his trailer. Scott’s been rude to him. All the X-Men are pretty rude to Jean. And look at what Scott says. “I was sent to bring you to their headquarters! And they don’t take no for an answer!” And then, Scott fires at him with his energy blasts. That’s a pretty aggressive move. As Rambo would say, they drew first blood.

Anyways, Blob comes back to their mansion. Professor X tests his powers. Blob battles Iceman. It’s all going well, then Xavier invites Blob to join the team. Blob refuses. I would like to note it is entirely in one’s right to not join a random paramilitary organization just because they invite you. But let’s see how the Professor responds: “This is unheard of! No one has ever refused us before! You cannot be permitted to leave now that you know our identities– it is out of the question! Stop him, my X-Men! I must drive this memory from his mind! Take him to my lab!”

Again, we find a lot to unpack. First, it seems like Charles didn’t think things through. Why not find out if Blob is interested in joining the team before showing him your secret headquarters? Cyclops hadn’t even offered much of a choice before. Remember the “don’t take no for an answer”. First, Professor X says Blob can’t be permitted to leave. That’s the intention to take an entirely innocent man prisoner. He orders the X-Men to attack Blob, take him prisoner, take him to a “lab” so that Professor X can mindwipe him. To my reading, it’s absolutely clear who the villains are here.

Now, Blob does decide to strike back. But his reasoning his sound. His next actions seem entirely precautionary. He escaped from people who wanted to keep him prisoner and mess with his mind. It stands to reason they’ll come after him again. He decides to attack them first.

Somehow, he convinces the entire carnival to help him.

Angel showing up at the carnival would seem to confirm Blob’s suspicions that he is being hunted. Retaliation seems entirely justified.

Professor X is building an electronic mass influencer, which will let him mind-wipe entire crowds. This technology will eventually be improved upon by the Men in Black. Again, not ethical. It’s notable for being the first time we’ve seen him build a machine to enhance his telepathic powers. This is basically a forerunner of Cerebro.

Hey, a giraffe. Gorilla. Elephant.

Cyclops calls Blob a renegade mutant. Again, they started it. They’re the renegades. Cyclops’ words betray a clear “if you’re not with us, you’re against us” mindset.

“The whole human race will bow down to the Blob!” Okay, well. My earlier points stand. The X-Men attacked Blob without justification. But it’s possible he’s not an entirely virtuous character either. Maybe there are no heroes here.

“My will is your will!” Not cool, Xavier. You can’t just mindwipe an entire carnival because you feel like it.

“…the menace of the Blob…” You’re the menace, Angel.

“…the mutant who might have achieved greatness as an X-Man, had his honor been a match for his power.” What story were you reading, Stan? The X-Men have no honor.

Some milestones in this issue. We learn Cyclops’ first name is “Scott”. He’d been introduced as “Slim Summers” before.

This comic makes it clear that Beast is the bookish type. We see him reading “Advanced Calculus”. He speaks with unusually fancy language. Multisyllabic words and such. I had to look up “cognomen“.

I like how Kirby represents Professor X’s telepathic scan with floating eyes.

Note that they treat it as a big deal whenever Professor X locates another mutant. That implies there aren’t that many around.

As far as I can tell, the team is wandering all over the city looking for anybody who looks like a mutant. They keep seeing things they mistake for super-powers. It’s mildly clever.